My journey to showtime: Getting confident in masturbating for my lovers.

I love showing off. I love teasing and taunting my lovers with my body, making them go slowly crazy as the work day wanes on. I get so hot just knowing I’m so desired. My ego is fed, and no one can tell me I’m lumpy, frumpy or what have you at all! Let me take you on a mini journey on how I got to this point.

Building a healthy relationship with my body is very important. Carly S. talks on building up your body confidence and honestly it is some of the best advice I have ever found when it comes to building yourself up. Showing off, even when I feel like a lump, is one huge way I build it. I slowly started to “fem” myself up for even the most basic of dates. I would wear tighter tops, so my breast would muffin top and jiggle as we walked along the lake front. Feeling my partners’ eyes on me from just these simple changes filled me with such power and passion that I wanted it to continue.

Going along with that feeling, I began to explore more when we had foreplay. I was very shy to start obviously; the urge to always turn off the light was strong when it came to sex. But I’m great at faking a smile until I’m confident enough (yay customer service jobs). I started with the low purrs and whines, circling my nipples and licking them when I felt comfy enough to lift them to my lips. I’d watch their eyes and seek out ques to go harder or tease them longer. My favorite thing to do was gently rub my crotch on theirs and tell them not to touch for as long as possible. The passion that followed always left me breathless and happy as a clam.

The next big thing, which I touched on a little earlier, was “fem”ing myself up. Growing up, I went through the stage of “EVERYTHING BLACK AND DARK AND HOTTOPIC!” Add in anime cat ears and baggy hoodies I stole from my brother and uh…I was that kid. And that kid turned into an adult who loved beads and look like a Degrassi extra as Devil Food so kindly put once. I got cuter clothes, but there is still something I need to do for myself, at least once. See, I hate shaving my groin. I hate the feeling of the hair growing back like…not even a full 24 hours later. After reading Leila Loren’s piece on waxing, I’m excited to try it. I’ll keep you all posted as far as that goes.

All this building and teasing. Masturbating in front of my lovers has become a wonderful production. I am confident to bend over and spread my cheeks as I twerk down to Devil Food’s dick. Hubby gets to enjoy watching me slowly strip down, lifting my belly for him to see that I don’t care about my size as much. I even turn myself on from watching videos of myself that I had just sent them.

Honestly, I still have my down days. Hell, last week during my birthday I didn’t feel good until I had put on a full face of makeup. IT HAPPENS. And it’s ok. That is what I tell myself.

Share with me how you start to get ready for a show cupcakes! Is there something you do to make yourself feel good enough to give your partner(s) a cute little show?

xoxo

3 comments

  1. LOVE THIS!!! There was a time, when I didn’t masturbate. I would feel self conscious about my body… as a result of an awful marriage. I love to explore and tease my mate(when I had a man heeheee) it helped that he resided overseas, by the time we actually saw each other in person… oooooo weeee!!!! Great post.

    Like

  2. It’s only been the last two years that I have been confident to masturbate in front of a man. But when it was in front of two, I really did enjoy them both looking on!

    Liked by 1 person

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